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Ride of the Week: The future is electric

Pictured is the Cadillac 2014 ELR. Fireball Tim Lawrence/22nd Century Media
Fireball Tim Lawrence
3:46 pm PDT August 18, 2014

Car companies are in a big boxing match. They’re getting beaned by each other saying, “Ours is the best;” “No, no, ours is the best!” But the bottom line is that we are all going to the same place. And that’s an EcoWorld. It’s like a theme park where all the rides are made out of plants and smells awesome. Better than SomberWorld, where you get on a rollercoaster, go up the ramp and then get off. Bleh!
But many car companies actually get the bigger picture. We all have to work together to make things better — to create the ideal world where things work in harmony to build an efficient lifestyle. Some are making hybrids, some plug-ins, some electric, some whatchamacallits. But pretty much everyone is on board. So, the thing to concentrate on here is design. Whew, I made it.
Cadillac’s new 2014 ELR was based on the stunning Converj concept car. It’s so close that this ELR actually feels like you’re driving a million bucks. Not sure you can say that with other hybrid plug-ins, but the design is straight up beautiful. I mean gorgeous. But you want stats, don’t you? OK then. How about 162-kilowatts total system power with 295-pounds per foot of torque with an all electric range of 37 miles. All of that married to a gas efficient backup. Total miles per gallon is 82. That’s just cool.
And then, there’s the design, again. Let’s compare. Caddy ELR versus a Tiffany necklace — not even a contest. The necklace has a tiny cup holder. Wait, not even. It’s teeny. OK, how about Caddy ELR versus Faberge Egg #342? Easy. Hip check the Caddy and see what happens. Egg? It’s done and you won’t be having breakfast. Meanwhile, you can take the silent, electric ELR to your favorite breakfast joint, like Neptune’s Net or a greasy spoon on Mulholland. Yeah, you know who you are.
Not convinced? How about the awesome haptid technology and touch proximity sensors? The what? Look it up, people. You’ll be glad you did.
But for this Fireball, the best thing about the ELR is that it feels like the right step to that EcoWorld. The ideal place where we can all just stop being boneheads for a bit and give what we want to get back. A little bit of goodness without judgement, criticism and whining. In the Caddy, everything just feels good. You want to take a deep breath and forget about all that nonsense with your 4-foot-tall boss. Nix that situation with your teenager and the cops. Blow off that comment on your Twitter from that whiney follower. #KnockItOff The 2014 Cadillac ELR is the safe zone. And it’s so cool that we all need to pull together and spread the AutoLove by busting out a #CaddySelfie.
Stop and close your eyes for a beat, inhale deeply and exhale those lame-o thoughts. Visualize yourself cruising in this red gem and realize that the future is electric. Even if all of them aren’t there just yet, we’re all on the same boat, baby. Chill, and be one with the ELR.
Want to be featured as one of Fireball’s Rides of the Week? Let him know what you’ve got and he may even bring you chocolate! Be sure to watch his show “5MINUTE DRIVE” on Youtube. It’s the world’s coolest Talk Show on the Go!